I really struggled with what to write for this post. I stared at my computer screen, trying to find the words to say whatever it was I needed to say. Ultimately nothing came out and I went to bed.
Lately I’ve found myself in a slump, you could say. The past month has just been kind of rough. I find myself having more off days than good and having a harder time finding joy in the little things. I think it’s a combination of things. Last month was my birthday, it was the one year anniversary of my mom passing away (she passed away days after my birthday in 2016), now it’s my Mom’s birthday. I know it’s alright to be sad, it’s natural, but I know that my mom wouldn’t want me to be a gloomy mess all the time.
Right now I feel like I’m only dwelling on the past instead of enjoying the present. While I of course want to and will continue to remember all of the wonderful times I shared with my mom, I don’t want to be sad when I reflect on those moments. I want to look back with happiness in my heart and then enjoy what’s going on currently.
As I said, it’s been a rough month but that’s alright. I’m going to put more effort into recognizing the little moments of beauty everyday. I want to show my friends and family that I care. Being sad is normal but I don’t want it to be the only thing I am.
That’s where I am right now. Life is business as usual and I’m doing all I can to stay positive and happy. What’s new with you?